| (no subject) |
[Oct. 31st, 2004|11:54 pm] |
yo :D
great halloween!
we had our first band practise today, and man, i've missed being in a band :0)
true we're really rough, but we did some pretty good greenday covers and stuff.
Loz's voice is pretty light and he sounds quite similar.
then we went to buy eggs and flour :D
the only place open at half 9 on a sunday was the tesco's, so we went only to find there were no eggs on the shelves and just a sign saying they weren't selling them to kids or teenagers, and anyone else had to ask for them from behind the counter.
So, being already a little tipsy, everyone had a schoolboy-esque attack of nerves, and despite being 21, no-one wanted to ask for them, especially cuz we wanted lots, so we decided i'd go up, and loz went to buy food, that way he could distract the older staff member, and I could work my magic on the younger one :P
Anyway, so I paid for my reduced chicken cesar wrap (from £1.99 to 25p :D) and my Fridjj, and while Loz was watching me as he paid for his, calmly announced:-
"Excuse me, are the eggs free-range?"
Loz started pissing himself, and had to turn away, while the girl at the counter looked confused and replied "Uh, i'll just go check". So it turned out they were, and she brought a box back and bagged it up.
"Yeah, can I have another three boxes please?"
Loz was trying really hard not to laugh, which was probably making it worse, so I piad for them and we left and went back to mark's to get dressed up for Halloween.
well. I *say* dressed up.
I wore a huge army camo jacket, a world war 2 gas mask and a chainsaw (with the chain removed :P)
Mark had a really cool skeleton mask and ribs which he wore with his hoody.
Loz had a Suicidal Tendancies mesh cap and a bandana, both of which he borrowed from a reluctant Mark :D
we went to the castle to have a pint and see Becky, then to spoons for another.
Then we went to pick the eggs and spray paint we'd stashed, and drove round in loz's car, throwing eggs at stuff.
It was a bit lame to be honest, since a) we're 21 and not 12, and b) it was 11:30 on a sunday, so no-one was out, except for old people, young girls, and dog walkers, and I wouldn't let loz or mark egg any of them, so we settled for the occasional sign post or window of places we don't like (council house especially :P) ah well. It brought back happy childhood memories :D
"I heard you crying loud
all the way across town
you've been looking for that someone
and it's *me* out on the prowl
as you sit around feeling sorry for yourself" |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 26th, 2004|07:21 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  relaxed | ] |
| [ | music |
| | john mayer - kid a (radiohead cover) | ] |
*yawns*
man, i'm well tired. Didn't get much sleep, and buses always make me sleepy :)
Had a pretty good day though. Wondered round Shrewsbury and met Jess, and we hung out and did a bit of shopping (mainly looking at princess-related stuff) and had a drink and talked about lots of stuff. It was really good for me, and I feel pretty sweet about everything. Think i'll sleep easy tonight :D
Family Guy series 4 is being filmed. Well. Worked upon, so we should get that by around May next year :D
By the way, does anyone have any views on the US elections? Who do you think will win? |
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| ack, haven't updated in aaaaaaaaaaaaages |
[Oct. 25th, 2004|12:01 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  contemplative | ] |
| [ | music |
| | playing bass | ] |
Had a pretty good day today, was raining *all* day, and I really like the rain, so that was cool (if a little weird of me :P)
I had a huuuuuge hangover this morning, which admittedly was my own fault, and a bunch of texts from people asking how Loz was, cuz apparently we kissed :'(
I'm sure it was more Loz than me though :P
Me and Mark started dubbing his Brighton film, "To Kill A Kieron" which was the funniest thing we've done in weeks :D
We spent four hours trying out different voices and various takes to end up with a total of 1 minute 30 seconds of a 45 minute film dubbed!
We eventually settled on my American accent for the male doctor, and mark's squeaky-voiced faux-lady effort for the female one :)
Then Predator was on, which is quite probably the best action film of ALL TIME, EVER!! ha, well up there at least :D
*wanted to be arnie when he was little*
I've got more dubbing to do tomorrow, and the job centre with Ian, which will mean I can finally start my driving lessons :D
Then i'm going to meet up with Jess in Shrewsbury on tuesday, which i'm not sure how I feel about that, but I guess we'll see. Hopefully, later this week i'll be going to Aber to meet up with all my uni friends who I haven't seen for months, so that'll rock :D
Best kids cartoons ever:
Teenage Mutant Ninja/Hero Turtles
He-man (and the recent remake)
Bananaman,
DuckTales
Smurfs
Jimbo
Poddington Peas!
Ghostbusters
Dangermouse
Button Moon
Clangers
Superted,
Round the world with wily fogg :D
Bertha!
Chip & Dale - rescue rangers!
hmmm.. and probably more I can't remember :D
soooo, sooooooo much better than kids TV today :P |
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| long, long night |
[Aug. 1st, 2004|08:51 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  drained | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Bouncing Souls | ] |
I watched pornography with my dad this morning.
It was very.. liberating, but in any case, let me start at the beginning.
(apologies if some/all of this makes no sense, since i'm still a little hungover)
Mark's parents are in Italy, on holiday for two weeks, so for that time, he's got the house to himself (and his brother), so i've been crashing at his, since they left, spending each day drinking heavily, and doing.. well.. very little at all, aside from planning the ninja film we're going to shoot soon.
As an aside, REAL ninjas, don't wear headbands with the word "ninja" on. :P
Anyway, our good friend Finchy, has been dropping by most days to chill, play wargames or on the ps2 or watch Alan Partridge (Aha!).
Finchy's mum is totally over-protective, and he has to be home by 11 o'clock, which means he can't drink, since he needs to drive home.
Last night however, she let him sleep at mark's house, so he could go out and have some beers with the rest of the crew, since it was our friend Corfield's 21st birthday.
Upon getting to Mark's Finch discovered he'd punctured a tire, and it was rapidly deflating, so we decided we change it in the morning (today) rather than do it yesterday.
By this time, I was already suffering from bad cold/flu, and my nose was pretty much constantly dripping, much to mark's chagrin :P
anyway, we hung out at Mark's, I slept, then at 7:30, I woke up, and chained some beers with Mark and Finch before we went into town an hour later.
we met up with Corfield and friends, had a few beers, some shots, went to a few different pubs, then walked into low-town to the rugby club, where Corf's party was to be held.
What followed was many hours of drunken fun and debauchery, with the funniest moments including:
Corf getting a wedgie by two rugby players, that ripped his pants to pieces, and suspended him in the air, held purely by the waist of his shredded pants, till one of them let go, and he fell on his face, too drunk to feel any pain.
Asking Helen to use her feminine charms on the DJ, to get him to play MC Hammer, then being miffed because he didn't play it >.<
Us asking Helen to go out with Finch.. Go on! Go ooooooooon! You know you want to! Finch! Put your arm round Helen! Helen, take pity on him, he hasn't had a lady in 2 and a half YEARS!! (and this with pretty much every girl there)
Finch having his first cigarette in 9 months, after quitting, then getting it confiscated by me, before three of us reprimanded/slapped him.
Mark going into the club, steering clear of the bar and straight towards the buffet.. :P
My phone being stolen by a group of my friends, who loudly round out my text messages to passersby, including the pervy ones. Actually, mainly the pervy ones. Sorry bout that Jess :P
At some point, Loz chundered and went home, but not before setting his public hair alight :0)
and many other comedy moments, that were only funny if you were there. and you probably had to be really drunk to appreciate them too.
Anyway, all good things must come to an end, and by 12:30, the bar closed, so at about 1:20am, we all decided to go for a curry. By all of us, I mean Chris and Gaz, with their limitless supply of money >.<
Anyway, i'm not even slightly sure of what happened next, but as far as we can make out, it went like this.
Some guy shoved Finchy, crossing the bridge between high town and low town.
For those of you that are interested, here's a good photo of it:
http://www.brantacan.co.uk/BridgNorthViewBS.jpg
The rugby club is that brown building next to the clock tower, with the little blue square (it's a notice board).
..anyway. Some guy shoves Finch, Finch hurls some random insult (in Welsh, no less) as he walks off, one of they guy's friends, Caddy punches Finch in the face, flooring him. As you do if you're a drunken twat. Caddy was one of Corf's friends, from the rugby club, as far as I know, but Corf charges him, and starts brawling with him in the middle of the road, right where that red car is on the left of the photo. At this point me and Leggy see Corf's fighting up ahead, and run in, breaking them up, with me trying to hold Corf back and calm him down.
Unfortunately, no-one was doing the same to Caddy, so while i'm holding Corf back, Caddy's running around trying to bait him, which is getting Corf more worked up, and some other kid runs in to help me hold Corf back. At this point I should probably mention that Corfield is like 6'11, so he's not the smallest of all people to try and restrain.
Anyway, after about 10 minutes, i try to get Corf back to Leggy's house, which isn't far, when two 30-year-old-ish twats appear, one with short brown hair, the other a skinhead.
Twat #1 : "Don't hold 'em back mate!! Let 'em fight!!"
Me : "Err.. yeah, you're not helping, can you get out the way please?"
so these two guys keep trying to goad Corf and Caddy to fight, which is generally pissing everybody off, up until one the skin head guy pulls Leggy away from restraining Caddy/calming him down, with the intention that Caddy will then go attack Corf. Anyway, seeing this guy pull Leggy away, Leather gently pulls the guy away from him, telling him just to leave them. The skin turns around, twats leather in the face, he goes down too, and Gaz runs in and throws the skin off, before he does anything else to Leather.
At this point, everything goes totally to shit. I see the short haired dude (twat #1) start punching leggy in the back of the head while he tries to restrain Caddy, so I leave Corf with the other dude, and throw twat #1 into the middle of the street, Corf breaks free, Caddy pushes Legg off, so corf and caddy start fighting, a few more people I didn't know join in, and I rush to hold Corf back, throwing a few punches at the guys beating on Corf as I get in. Then Leggy tries to sort twat #1 out, by calmly explaining "Shag, just leave him alone for a min.."
*crack*
twat #1 head butts Leggy, breaking his nose, Leggy backs off holding his face, at this point, I think alcohol got slightly the better of me, cuz I left Corf to fend off some girl, who was hitting him with a handbag, and went to town on twat #1, throwing him off Leggy, and (hopefully) repaying the favour. Anyway, seeing his mate getting a kicking the skin starts on me, punches in some sort of bizarre drunken fashion, which consisted of me simply stepping back everytime he swung, till he turned on corf who wondered past, still fighting about three people, the skin swings at corf, so I kicked him in the back of the legs, which made him sink to his knees. then I went back to trying to break up the fight between Corf and everybody else.
By this time there was upwards of about 20 people fighting on the bridge, and my attempts at calming everyone down wasn't going well. Finch and Chris were still injured, Gaz was with them, all standing well clear of the ruckus, and Mark (who's pacifistic) was giving me moral support, checking I was okay when twat #1 punched me a few times in the face while I was helping some guy up.
At this point, the two fucks who'd pretty much caused the mini-riot had fled, cuz the police came in force, with two or three squad cars, and the riot van.
Naturally, they questioned me and mark first, cuz we were with Vikki, who'd walked that way home after work and we were the least dishevilled looking people there.
"It was 4 guys.. from Wolverhampton, I think!"
was pretty much the best I could think of at the time. We get a lot of people from Wolvo come to bridgnorth to fight, so whenever there's danger of someone getting arrested or cautioned, it get's blamed on mysterious people from wolverhampton, that just ran away.
"It was a tall guy mainly, big black hair, blue shirt, we think he ran away down by the riverside"
Just when it looked as if the pigs were beliving us, the radio crackles "Blah blah blah, suspect has blond hair, no shirt, seen running towards the round about"
pretty much the opposite of my not entirely convincing work of fiction.
So, the pigs, question everyone, caution a few people, ask if I want to make a statement, etc etc.
Before one car drives Leggy and Corf home, because the cop knew them both, and laughed it off. Despite Leggy's "Can I have an ambulance? Please??" they wouldn't call for one, telling him to sleep it off.
He gets his nose broken a few times a year playing rugby, but it was still a little harsh.
Amusingly enough, when they were taking statements, we were stood in the middle, with Corf's group one side, and Caddy's group the other, so when they wanted my details, I just told the guy the other woman had already taken them, gave him a winning smile, then we headed back up to Marks.
Leather and a few other people we coming back to Mark's for a few joints and to watch tv (which reminds me, with about 6 pigs stood around us, Mark drunkenly shouts to me "DUDE!! WE GOING BACK TO SMOKE SOME WEED?!" *laughs* idiot..
but in the end Leather went home, after we checked he was okay.
So me, Mark and Finch get back to mark's, all talked about what just happened, and trying to understand it all, when i spot Finch's elbow's grazed, and bleeding slightly, from when he was punched and went down on the pavement, so he goes to wash it off, while me and mark are talking to Vikki on MSN.
"Dudes, what do you think this is?"
Finch comes in holding his elbow up, and shows us this bit of metal sticking out.
Me and Mark: "What the fuck?"
upon examining it, it looks like there's a screw embedded in Finch's elbow, with the head of the screw under the skin, and the screw-y bit, the thred, maybe? sticking out of a small hole.
So, we poke it for a bit, then prod it, then photograph it, then I offer to cut it out, but nooooo, Finch want's to go to hospital, and have it removed by a 'professional' :P
so I phone up bridgnorth hospital, at what's now just coming up to three AM (About 7 hours ago from when i write this now), tell them what's up, to which the woman replies "Well, we don't have a doctor here tonight, so you'd have to go to Telford hospital" which we couldn't do, cuz Finch had a flat tire (for those of you that read this far, and remember that, well done! :0)
So, I tell her we can't make Telford, and it's not worthy of an ambulance, so she tells me to bring him in, and they'll have a look at least.
So, me and Mark walk Finchy to the hospital, all still drunk, but fairly happy about it. Well, not so much Finch, but that's possibly only because me and mark kept poking him..
We rang the night bell, and were let in, spending about 45 minutes, while the nurses poked the screw, and generally admitted they didn't know what to do. So they phoned the doctor, who told them to send him to telford the following morning.
Was about it really. The highlight of the visit would be Finchy timidly asking where the toilet was, being directed to it, and told the light switch was on the right of the door.
*ALARM*
yeah, Finch hit the panic button, and the nurses raced into action to save him.
And by raced, I mean, one stayed and carried on talking to me, the larger one waddled down to check everything was okay.
So folks, seriously don't go to Bridgnorth hospital if you don't want to be poked, and largely ignored in the event of an emergency.. :P
"But what about the pornography?" I hear you cry!
Well, i'm getting to that.
I basically haven't slept, because the Beast. Otherwise known as Mark is the loudest fucking snorer I have *ever* heard.
I mean, i've slept at his before, and he's a loud bastard when he's been drinking, but this morning, it was like a dirtbike next to me. I swear some of those sounds weren't human.
By next to me, I mean *in a seperate bed, situated about 4 feet to my left* :P
Anyway, at 7, I wake up, drink some more Lemsip, which i've been doing all yesterday, and decide to come home, to get some more medication/sleep, before going back to mark's to change Finchy's tire, and go to telford hospital to him.
When I get home, just before 8am, my parents are up, and tell me to go check out the PC downstairs. I do this.
Then my dad's like "It's your aunty Christine's. Would it be suitable for one of the guy's at your mum's work?"
So I reply "Well, it depends? if he has children, you may want to delete all the pornography on there first"
".....................................what?"
"Pornography?"
"......por...?"
"naked ladies?"
"what do you mean pornography?"
"you know? like films of an adult nature?"
"oh, films?"
"well.. the kind that are really short and have little or no plot yes"
My mum's in bed, going "Oooh, do you think it's Derek's?" (my aunty's ex-husband)
My dad, still unbeliving demands that i show, so i take him downstairs, and show him the Kazaa (not KazaaLite! But Kazaa! *shakes his head* idiots..) 'My shared Folder' directory
"Well?"
"Urrr.. look at the file names.. tis porn, isn't it?"
"Tabitha Stevens BJ? What's that?"
"Well, from watching it, i'm guessing Tabitha's the name of a fairly skilled porn actress"
"Pictures?"
"no.. film.. remember we've been through this already"
"Show me!"
"ummmm... okay" so I double click the file, opening with a superbly directed, well composed shot of Tabitha's.. umm.. lady bits?
"Oh. that *is* porn"
"I told you!" so I skip forward a bit, seeing Tabitha do feats that possibly only Jess could beat ;)
"Okay then. well, can you delete it?"
then I explain how with all the shit installed on that crappy heap of junk, the only solution is to wipe everything and start again. On one side, since it's a compaq pc, it probably comes with a quick restore CD, to revert it to its factory default state, but we'll see.
Anyhow, bear in mind i'm still not quite sober, and the account here is very much from my perspective, so make of it what you will :0)
Laters people!
ps. My cold/flu is much better now, thanks for asking ;)
xx
Oh, I forgot something!
Loz is a cocky, slightly racist bastard, not to mention car-thief, and whenever we chat to him on MSN, he's always going on about shagging our mums and stuff.
So. Mark was taking a shower, and I was chatting to some people, while logged in as him. Loz starts chatting to us, and we trade insults, till he starts going on about shaggin my (mark's) mum.
"Dude. My mum's dead"
*pause*
"what?"
at this point I logged off as Mark, and logged on as me, to see if there were any of my mates online.
*ping*
"Dude, mark's mum's not dead is she?"
"Yeah man, happened about a year ago. Don't mention it though, he's really fragile about it"
*pause*
"Oh man, I was joking about it, and I think I really upset him"
"Dude!! The last time Leather mentioned it, Mark shut himself in his room for two weeks, and wouldn't come out!!"
*pause*
"Uhhh.. uhh.. .have you got his phone number?? Can you text him and tell him i'm really sorry and I didn't know?"
So, this carries on for about 15 minutes, with Loz getting increasingly really worried.
"And man, it was really tragic how she died too..."
"Oh fuck, what am i going to do?? How did she die?"
"Apparently she shagged some kid called Loz, and picked up a bunch of STDs... :P"
*pause*
"YOU F**** B***** C**** S**** etc etc etc"
so when ever Loz takes the piss now, me and mark are just "Hey Loz, remember that time you thought Mark's mum was dead" and he has to laugh and admit that we wound him up good :P |
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| "Bastard!! He gave me a mango!" |
[Jul. 18th, 2004|12:19 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | amused | ] |
| [ | music |
| | the cure - just like heaven | ] |
peeeeeeeeeople.
i'm updating! be proud and stuff!
it's just gone eleven, and i've been watching Empire of the Sun, which I hadn't seen since I was like 10.
Jess came over and we had a really good time :0)
and.. and!! we got a dvd of around the world with willy fog! cuz we hadn't seen it for ages, and Jess reminded me the theme tune by humming!
I got Prince Of Persia for the ps2 too, since i've been wanting to play that and Ninja Gaiden for a while.
And I got parappa the rapper 2, cuz it was on offer!
I took her to the pub too, to show her off to my mates :P
hmmm.. what else did we do that was great?
oh yeah, I brought Jess like the most amount of chocolate ever ever ever, and we went out of my room and left the door open, and charlie (the dog) snuck upstairs and ate Jess's chocolate *AND* her chocolate brownie!!
I don't think she was very happy... :0\
and Jess is the grumpiest sleeper in the world
like, i'll wake up, and see she doesn't have much duvet, so I spread it over her, then she wakes up and shouts "noooooooo duvet" at me, so I apologise and take the duvet off, then she'll complain about me stealing all the duvet, and yank it back. That cycle pretty much continues the WHOLE night :0)
and she made me watch Big Brother!!
*sighs* I need a new girlfriend >.<
But Avril's still not returning my calls... ;)
But even with the very occasional bout of grumpiness (which i'm sure was my fault anyway :) we had a great time.
Especially on the last night :0)
Laters people! x |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 26th, 2004|02:14 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | cheerful | ] |
Man, watching a documentary on BBC2, about the sea life that inhabits Japanese sea planes and ships that were sunk in 1942. It's really beautiful to see these instruments of war decayed but still (for the most part) in one piece, and teeming with thousands of fish, and brightly coloured coral :0)
*feeds Meg some 'WILDEBEADT' and ruffles her hair* |
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| ho hum |
[Jun. 25th, 2004|04:16 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  energetic | ] |
Not having too bad a day today, thus far.
Dad got a new laptop, so i got to configure it, and it's mazin
its a Dell Latitude d600, for anyone interested, and I wouldn't mind getting one myself.
Decent sized HDD, good graphics (well, for a laptop) with the ATI mobility chipset, CD writer/DVD, a touchpad AND pointing stick, AND it's so preeeeetty *huggles it*.
Spent most of the day cutting down trees, cuz my parents want more light in the garden or something.
Cutting down trees is fun, sadly my parents won't let me use an axe, cuz for some reason *no-one* trusts me to use one resposibility, so I had to use the saw >:0/
We're going to Ikea in a bit to buy some shelves, cuz I don't have any more floor left to put stuff. I'm still planning to somehow take over my sister's much larger room, complete with double bed. grrr. But i'm not sure how i'd go about that, i'll probably have to wait until she goes to uni >.<
oh well, laters! |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 25th, 2004|01:00 am] |
man. im totally gutted.
we played badly but we didn't deserve that
fucking hell. the swiss are suppposed to be neutral, right?
I was pissed by half-time, and totally ratted by the penalties.
still, I met loads of people, and got a kiss from an old mate, cuz she hadn't seen me for ages :0)
met *loads* of new people, and apparently there's a 'bridgnorth' kelly brook, apparently the nicest girl in bridgnorth, though i'm convinced she's a crack-whore :S
one of my mates in contact with my exgirlfriend told me she's said that 'sometimes being with me was "okay", but most of the time it wasn't', so she can fuck off
plus I get back to find my room's been 'tidied-up'/re-arranged/totally fucked up by my parents, who've pretty my pissed me off to the point that I actually hate them now.
Plus the copied key they gave me, wouldn't let me in when I got back from the pub, so I had to wake half the street up trying to get someone to let me in, and I got in trouble for it. "did you push it in and out and waggle it backwards and forwards *insert meaningless string of commands to follow to get the badly copied key to work*, cuz you need to do that?" my dad asked
"I'm not trying to fuck the keyhole, i'm trying to get inside, and normally you put the key in and turn it, idiot"
seriously, i'm totally fed up, so hopefully i'll be able to get a place with Leggy soon, cuz he's trying to get a job too. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 24th, 2004|06:30 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  apathetic | ] |
Just going down the pub to watch the football.
mum spazzed out twice today, but fortunately the dog and the vacuum cleaner were on the recieving ends.
One of my cousins killed himself, so I guess she's been too busy being upset and stuff.
Still, its probably a free trip to the US for the funeral.. ;) |
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| What's up with everyone at the moment? |
[Jun. 23rd, 2004|08:55 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  confused | ] |
The whole world is going crazy.
i'm sure.
This morning was possibly the most confusing, weenerish moment for ages though.
I was watching some stephen king film on sky last night, when I fell asleep on the sofa (which is nowhere near as comfortable as my old sofa, which would happily accomodate me *and* my girlfriend, spooning), when I was awoken at about 5 am, by my mum, in a generally annoyed state, shouting at me for wasting electricity or something, but seeing as I was technically half-asleep, I shrugged it off and went upstairs and fell asleep in my bed.
Then, i'm woken up *again* by my mum, picking random things up off my bedroom floor, then dropping them in as noisy and conspicious a manner as possible.
"You woke me up at 5 in the morning, so now i'm going to wake you up"
crash.. bang.. etc, etc
all of which was met by me rolling over and falling asleep.
next thing I know, i'm woken up again by mum, who wants to lecture me on why its suddenly important to have a job RIGHT THIS SECOND to pay off my student loan.
Pointing out to her that her understanding of the student loan system was somewhat skewed, didn't seem to help, and she continued to wake me up every five minutes, until I pointed out to her, that there was no way I had woken her up, cuz I was asleep downstairs, and the tv was on quietly, and had been for several hours before she woke up. She conceeded that something else had probably woken her up, but was still in a bitchy mood with me.
"Let me go to sleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep" I requested.
this was returned by a sudden demand to repay her a tenner for a father's day present she'd picked up, and not having 10 quid, i had to give her a 20 pound note, on the grounds that she'd give me 10 back when she got back from work.
Taking the £20, she suddenly says "Oh, actually, i think i'll use the other tenner for petrol"
which didn't make any sense to me, so I assumed it was some sort of stupid joke or something.
Next she suddenly demands that I pay her £25 for every week i've been living here since I got back from uni.
"What, who decided that? Let me see the contract I quite blatantly didn't sign" I roll over and attempt to go back to sleep for, quite possibly, the millionth time.
"You WILL pay it, or you can find somewhere else to live"
"Okay, that's cool with me" - in retrospect it may have been this statement that began the course of events which were to follow.
"..how about we'll have a deal. Aysh's borrowed £100 from you recently, and dad's just payed another £400-something for a season ticket that she has to repay. How about I start paying you that back rent when she pays that off" I joke, knowing Aysh would probably end up not having to pay the money back at all
Then, for no apparent reason, mum has, what can only be described as a complete spaz-out, starts shouting obscenities at me, lunges onto my bed and twats me.
It was reminiscent of that scene in the first Lord of the Rings film, in Rivendell, when Bilbo tries to take back the ring from Frodo, and his face goes all scary.
Anyway, having seemingly having forgotten that i'm now 21 and over six feet tall, and beating me isn't going to make me cry or run away any more, she clearly thought I was going to take it.
Instead, I kicked the duvet up between me and her, which got in the way of her hand the second time, and as she continued to scream bloody murder at me, I threw the rest of the duvet over her head, forced it down onto the matress and pulled her hand up behind her back.
As you can imagine, this didn't go down too well.
I kept responding to her (now rather empty) threats, that I wasn't going to let her go unless she CALMED DOWN.
She continued to shout (muffled), giving a fairly impressive display of language, that would make most sailors blush.
This was met by me leaning next to where I presumed her head to be under the duvet and telling her "Only one of us has worked as a bouncer, and i'm not going to let you go until you calm down, so you might as well do yourself a favour, and stop struggling"
After about three minutes, she'd stopped yelling at me, and struggling, so I pulled the door open, and pushed her out, telling her she wasn't coming back inside my room.
"You've done it now, you can leave, get out of my house"
"Yeah, right. now fuck off"
"WHAT?!? *more shouting*"
"How about we do this the easy way? You go calm down, before I phone dad up, and tell him you've gone crazy"
"*more abuse*"
"What time is it?" I ask, and getting no reply, check my phone. "It's half five in the morning!!!"
"I know *abuse*"
"Your daughter has a A-level exam in a few hours, and is trying to sleep about 3 metres away. Could you be a bit less considerate"
"*silence* *pause* *more shouting at me*"
"Okay then, well how about I stroll down to the police station a few hundred yards down the road, and notify them?"
"wh.. what?"
"You know, of how you just assaulted me? Would you like to come too, it'd probably be easier?"
"but.. but I didn't hit you"
"No, but you tried, and you threatened me. The alternative is I phone them, and we have two friendly policemen at the front door"
Now, this was pretty carefully thought out. Mum knows that i'd do it too, cuz i'd find it funny, and I know she'd die of embarrassment if the pigs came round because of a domestic complaint, in front of all the neighbours
"well.. *sniff* *sniff* *runs off crying*"
So I roll over and go back to sleep.
Then mum comes back in;
"You hurt my finger!"
"*laughs*"
"*sob* YOU NEVER TELL ME YOU LOVE ME ANYMORE!!!"
"*laughs even louder*"
mum storms off.
I then actually get some sleep. For a couple of hours at least.
"I'm going to work now. I wrote you a letter"
"that's great mum. I'll read it when i'm awake"
"i'll leave it on here, perhaps you can read it and get back to me.... oh, by the way, I couldn't find any change, so here's your £20 back.."
so mum leaves, and Aysh goes to her exam.
I've got to scan this letter in, it's possibly the funniest thing ever.. A complete grovelling apology, without *any* kind of explanation. My favourite bit has to be "..you can hurt me with your words, but i will NEVER STOP LOVING YOU!!" with underlining too.
See, if this happened to someone else, i'd probably find it quite sad, or depressing, but as those who know me will understand, my parents are complete fucktards, and I don't get along with them at all.
Plus, now mum's spent the whole day being particularly nice to me, to the extent of cooking me some of my favourite food (mexican fajitas in a wrap with lettuce and tomatoes :)
as I said, people are crazy recently :S |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 22nd, 2004|07:18 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | accomplished | ] |
| [ | music |
| | been playing How Can You Be Sure? by Radiohead on the guitar | ] |
*looks around suspiciously with narrow eyes, sniffing the air and giving a slight quizical look, before finally relaxing and adopting the seiza no kamae, a seated pose. His katana (broom handle) and shuriken (rusty old scapel) still within quick grasp in the event of any trouble*
I have decided two (2) very important things, that will probably affect my life forever onwards.
They are;
1) ninjas are very cool.
2) from now on, im going to be a ninja.
In light of this lifestyle change, I have donned suitable black and grey apparel, and have tied a grey tie around my head.
I have also completed much of the kids section of www.winjutsu.com, though already I have broken one of the rules by practising without a trained sensei. or "Qualified Bujinkan ninjutsu instructor!" as they would have it.
To this end, i think it's only fair to warn any aspiring samurai out there, that at any time, I could be sneaking over their garden fence, scaling the side of their house with my shuko (climbing claws), breaking through their bedroom window, with my ninja.. umm.. crowbar.. and asassinating them with a poisioned throwing knife.
muwahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!
ahem.
in any event, i've started work on my ninja comic again.
i'm not sure whether to draw it and scan it in (which is a bad idea because of my complete inability to draw), or to draw it straight into the computer with the graphics tablet, in Toon Boom Studio or something vector-y (which would give it the cheesey web-comic look).
hmmm.. i'll have to think.
Also, i'm playing Phantasy Star Online (1+2), and it's been so long since I played them, I can't find how to get the map up full screen, any ideas :S
Domo Arigato!
hehe
*BANG! ...by the time the smoke clears, Spordan is nowhere to be seen, leaving behind the only trace of his presence; a gamecube pad, and a grey tie* |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 14th, 2004|02:28 pm] |
Best episode of Doctors. EVER.
Anyone know how I can get £200, fairly quickly :0\ |
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| yaaaaaaaaaaaaay! |
[Jun. 8th, 2004|03:54 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  sleepy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Bouncing Souls - Hopeless Romantic | ] |
i'm back!
forever and ever and ever and ever!
but my computer is being really lame, so i'm using my sisters now, and going to order a new motherboard/CPU/RAM and prob PSU too, and make everything all okay again :D
umm... wow.. really nothing interesting to write :S
I miss all my Aber mates!
And I spent ages on the phone the last two nights to Jess, cuz she was a sad Jess :0(
But I think she's happier now.
Everyone's doing exams, which sucks, cuz they're all stressed out and stuff :S
Oooh.. I spoke to Meg lots, which is always creepy, cuz we have lots in common, possibly as a result of her stalking me and making notes, i'm not sure :P
*scratches his head*
but nothing's particular interesting happened so far today.
Doctor's was so-so, and i'd seen the episode of Diagnosis Murder before :S
hmmmm.. got to go find a job.
*after* i've had a shower and woken up, and i'm feeling more coherent :D
laters x |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 26th, 2004|06:54 pm] |
only one more exam, then i've finished university for ever and ever and ever and ever and ever... well, till I have to resit all the exams i've failed, but still :0)
And for some reason, I keep getting really sick and puking up blood and luminous green stuff, but hey, laters x |
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|
| I stole Meg's thingy :S |
[May. 18th, 2004|07:18 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | happy | ] |
Hey, it's my birthday!! Going to go out, laters people!!
oh, but first:
X=true
( ) I never shoplifted
(X) I never have been fired
( ) I have never cut myself on purpose
( ) I never have been in a fist fight
(X) I never had a 3-some
(_) I never snuck out of my parent's house
( ) I never have been tied up (sexually)
( ) I never been caught masturbating
( ) I never pissed on myself (accidentally!)
(X) I never had sex with a member of the same sex
( ) I never had sex with a member of the opposite sex
(X) I never have been arrested
( ) I never made out with a stranger
( ) I never stole anything from my job(SCHOOL COUNTS)
(X) I never celebrated New Year's in Time Square
(X) I never went on a blind date
(_) I never lied to a friend
( ) I never had a crush on a teacher
(X) I never celebrated Mardi-Gras in New Orleans
(_) I never have been to Europe
(_) I never skipped school
( ) I never slept with a co-worker
(X) I never have been fisted and/or have fisted anyone
( ) I never have thrown up in a bar
( ) I never have purposely set myself on fire
( ) I never have eaten sushi
(X) I never have been snowboarding
(_) I never have been happy with myself
(X) I never have met a movie star
( ) I never had sex in a pool
( ) I never went to a prom
(X) I never bungee jumped
(_) I never have been to a pop concert
(_) I never have dated someone for over a year
(X) I never sold naked pictures of myself
(X) I have never been in a car accident
(_) I have never had my heart broken
(X) I have never held a baby white tiger
(_) I have never slept naked
(_) I have never asked a member of the opposite sex on a date |
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| Heeeeeeeeeeeeeey |
[May. 17th, 2004|02:26 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | horny | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Incubus - I wish you were here | ] |
Hey people!
Did you miss me?
been having a sweet time in Aber.
mainly cuz its really hot and sunny, so we've been going down on the beach and having bonfires and BBQs and stuff!
We (the Rocsoc) rugby team played the Aber firsts/seconds/thirds mixed team on wednesday, and it was possibly the greatest day *ever*
I met up with Moggy the night before to pick up my shirt (black with my number and 'nickname' on the back) and mouth guard, and then we met up at 12 on wednesday to walk down to the pitch.
We had a team of cheerleaders, all dressed (barely) in short tartan skirts and what-not to cheer us on, and in all fairness we played like gods :D
We still lost, like, but we had fun causing the aber team at least a little panic. muwahahaha.
Also, the me-emlyn-fred front-line combo kicked arse, and though we played uncontested scrums, we won 90% of the rucks, cuz, well, we're big lads, and we rock :D
then the guy who owns the pub where rocsoc's held came round at half time with free beer, then after the match we invited some of the aber team to come back to the angel, who'd put a free buffet on for us too!
*cue much drinking, dancing and hilarity from 5pm till 1am*
Anyway, I got an exam tomorrow, and i'm not hugely looking forward to that, cuz its a resit, and I never went to any lectures, so i'm in the computer room now trying to revise.
ahem.
or actually, writing this and talking to vikki, but hey!
Jess comes over in 2 and a half hours, cuz it's my birthday tomorrow, so yay!
i'll be all old and stuff. But I get special birthday sex, so it's a fair trade off :0)
Anyway, time to do some actual work *shudder*
laters people! x |
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| No sleep |
[May. 10th, 2004|11:07 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | pessimistic | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Osker - piece by piece | ] |
It's 11:18, and i've been up for as long as I can remember.
My coursework was going really well, till I hit a brick wall, so I eventually had to hand it in with only about 60% finished :0\
I let Tony rip my work off, cuz he's lazy, and he wouldn't have done any himself, so he'll owe me for a while.. muwahahaha!
I worked out what I need to get in terms of exam results, and I need to get pretty damn high results just to come out with a third, so i'm not feeling overly optomistic, but oh well.
On top of that if I want to pass I pretty much *have* to buy the recommended texts, and the robotics one alone is £42 :0\
I've got the charity rugby match in 2 days, and we're going to get absolutely slaughtered by the firsts :0) so i'm quite looking forward to that.
I have CS364 coursework due in tomorrow, but I can't really do it, because I didn't do an earlier piece on which it relies, so i'm a bit boned there. 80% of the module marks are based on the exam though, so I need to break 50% on the exam to get a pass.
It's really misty outside, can just see the buildings the other side of the road looming through the fog.
ah, anyway, back to working I think, laters x |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 6th, 2004|04:47 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | slightly stoned | ] |
| [ | music |
| | none | ] |
*yawns*
sup, peeps?
I've been up since stupid-early playing tennis all day, and generally not doing any real work. I haven't updated in aaaaaaaages.
Fun things: i caved and brought a PS2, cuz of the need to play survival-horror games and RPGs. I got a new one from Game for £99.99, after a little fiddling ;)
and Final Fantasy X, and Devil May Cry, and now I got Metal Gear Solid 2, too.
And Jess came to visit, which was cool, cuz she rocks too, and we had like the best sex ever, although of course, I only mention it cuz the other day she said in a questionnaire that she hadn't had any in the last 24 hours, so :P
of course now, i'll probably never get any again.. but hey ;)
Though, i got food poisoning, and that sucked, cuz firstly I missed handing in some coursework, which means in all likelihood i'm going to have to invent a friend of family member who can 'die' so that I can get off, or otherwise I fail the year :0)
oh, and secondly, Jess was all worried. I think. I get the impression that she didn't really know what to do or say. So i'm hoping it was worry. and not like uncaringness or something :0)
One of my friends' friends met Avril Lavigne today.
which sucks, seeing how it wasn't me meeting her :S
But I digress. I feel a bit stoned actually. It comes from living in a house where *every* room is full of a strange-smelling fog :P
Anyway, Ben wants to go, and I can't think of anything exciting to say.
Oooh! Elly said I looked 'different' with a hair cut. Which i'm taking to mean 'better' :P
Anyway, Ben wants to go now, and who am I to keep a lady waiting? :P
laters x |
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|
| All the way from the gutter clutching a pack of StayAwake(tm) and swigging extra caffiene coffee |
[Apr. 27th, 2004|03:14 pm] |
Hey people!!!
Feel honoured that I have deigned to visit from my glorious throne overlooking you peasants! :D
I haven't slept for two days, and I haven't slept *properly* for a week. I may have started to hallucinate slightly :P
But! But! I've *finally* handed in my dissertation and code!
The dissertation hasn't too bad actually - 10,000 words. (well, 9, 800 ish) but the coding was a big pile of horse manure >.<
I'm going home now to collapse, before we all go out tonight for pound party, where I will inevitably get hugely inebriated and wind up yet again in the bed of some tart.
Um! I mean! at home! on my own!
Hey Jess! :P
Man, no-one is on-line to talk to except Vikki and Loz, though I do share the companionship of my flatmate Ben, sitting at the computer next to me. He's currently proof reading his essays to remove all the instances of the words "penis", "cockbite" and "big, hairy badger" that we slipped into his work while he was away from the computer :0)
Man, I was losing it last night through tiredness.
I was texting a mate who was also staying up to finish his diss, and started ending text messages with kisses xx
then I sent Jess a message telling her how I loved her, and only she got my *special* kisses, but sent that to Tony by mistake too.
Then I ran out of credit when he replied wondering why I was suddenly being super affectionate to him, and I haven't seen him since :0\
*yawns*
Its been so sunny recently in Aber! we've been down at the beach friday and sunday, to play rugby and frisbee in the sand, and admire the foxy bikini-clad uni girls! Ahhhh.. it's a hard life being a student :D
hmmm.. might celebrate the completion of my dissertation by buying a Playstation 2.. *imagines all the RPGs he could play*
umm.. anyway.. enough unintelligible dribble from me, till next time, my loyal subjects! x |
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spordan's journal